The Hardest Decision

they told me "you're going to be miserable and lonely when you get old with no kids, no one to take care of you!" who said kids always take care of their parents? that's so risky! even if i raised them so well there's a nature of loving parents and i dont know if it will be exists in them or not? and what a selfish reason for having a children? just someone will be there as a caretaker and as I said what guarantees do you have those children will even be around for you? I'm only 18 maybe I will change my mind later but now I'm really convinced and satisfied with my opinion that i would rather adopt than give a birth. so please don't try to work on my emotions like mentioning the biological clock and stuff like that cause you're going to waste your time on nothing. at the same time I'm not trying to push my beliefs on anyone if you're satisfied with having children so go ahead I won't stop you it's your own choices and beliefs. but i know myself so well I know I'll do my best to be a good parent but we all say that when we aren't actually a real parents when we aren't in the real situation but when we are in the situation the nature controls more than your decision of who you want to be. so why I want to risk to be shitty parent just to know if i could be a good one or not? I'm being a little smarter here by not giving a child a shitty life to satisfy myself and to prove if i could be a good mother or not. and what of I was a good parent but my kid was a bad one? how should I even know if my kid will react effectively with my advices? so many great mothers stick with little monsters! as I said I may be change my mind later but now these are my current beliefs.

The Holy Lana Del Rey

she's had touched my very inner soul so many times and i don't know if i should be angry or glad about that but her soothing voice gives me a glimpse of cold winter night in my heart and no body knows how much the cold winter nights mean to me, it really means a lot. so sad, lonely and warm at the same time.
nothing is sadder than the fact that Lana wrote "dark paradise" and had to perform it with controlled emotions while is was for the one she loved the most who died such a strong woman, when I watch her performing its like "aww, she's like a piece of art lost in time" she looks like those singers from the golden time old Hollywood. say what you want but she will be forever THE HOLY LANA DEL REY.

My Favourite Faded Fantasy

These words been in my notes for so long, i was planning to secretly send these words to you. it's not about courage, you know so well that I can send you anything as I did before when I started talking to you first. I just can't find any reason to send it to you, i dont want you to try to love me back because I love you that much? that's going to hurt more than quenching my feelings to you. but if i ever did and send it it will be because I have nothing to lose, and i don't think that what I'm going to say is going to take my pride away. it's just a feeling I can keep it to myself or say it, I'm not begging for something. I think you just deserve to know how much you are loved. i still remember that day, almost failed in the exam and i just saw your face so satisfied and happy so I immediately forgot my pain and became the happiest monkey on the earth for you, because i want you to be happy, and if it's not with me that's fine. because you're the only person I have loved enough to put before myself. seeing you happy makes me happy. and that's what love is.. right? i really don't know! I find it so creepy to say i love you cause i have commitment phobia and I'm such a freak when it comes to relationships, i even hate the phase of being in a relationship, thats so silly. i hate labels. everyone i know i dont consider him/her as something i just let it be. just hanging around and doing goofy things with no chains. just joy and laughters. I just cant define what I feel its something so big to put in words wallah, I don’t have to be the only one you dream about, the one that you can’t live without. I just wanna make you smile. all i want is to sparkle up your eyes, take you to my favorite places, listen to my favorite tracks with you, unfortunately I became less interested in everything but not in you. i spend so many nights wondering what it would be like if i had you for myself! I made a parallel universe, and carried it with me whenever you were around, so whenever you looked at me. I would close my eyes to stretch that look to last for me fair amount of minutes to keep me warm for the next sight of your eyes. It should be a map just to get out of your eyes. you're more than the mess they made of you. I would much rather take pictures of your face than the sky, I would rather write some poems on your arms, draw mini-sketches on your hands and paint the starry night on your pack of cigarettes while we are sitting somewhere than text you cheesy love quotes. I want to paint for you galaxies and nebulas so you never forget how extraordinary you are. they told us once you find that person that makes you happy in they way the no one else can, dont ever let them go and you make me happy even if you just passed in front of me! even if i caught your smile with someone else. okay my heart breaks a little when you smile with others instead of me but its okay at least I can see your beautiful smile, you know, sometimes i think that there are some people that one cant really forget, even if absolutely nothing happened between them, but there will always be this little...thing towards them, and it never really goes away. its funny how some things never change even after years. its ridiculous how after 3 years of *NOTHING* I still hold on waiting for something to happen! ist not that "ridiculous" i cant deny i enjoy loving you, Im so proud to say I love you that makes me feel like I have a great taste in people like I didnt fall in love before and when I fall I fall in someone like you! OKAY OKAY i cant say its love, because its not. and i really dont like the word "crush", because we are not 7 anymore. but its just something. i know its there, and i cant really label it as anything. but its there. i love everything about you from the way you walk to the faces you made when you didnt know what to say, i still remember they way your voice broke with embarrassed laughter. you have these beautiful eyes, starry just like magic, hidden dark cave, full of things I cant explain but i love it. time always freezes at the sight of your face, you're so grey and blue, confused like grey but also blue like the cover of my favorite poetry book, you're just like summer breeze. do you ever wonder if you have ever been that random person that someone saw and couldnt forget? i think you should wonder because you got that person who couldnt forget you.. its me! if someone asked about my death wish it would be definitely one long nighttime walk conversation with you and i will never regret this wish, EVER. ohh I wish you could see that smile upon my face rn. I can’t seem to tell you but I want this feeling to last as warm as the sunshine. it hurt, but i love it.

Why Do I Volunteer?

by Terrance Shawn McGill

((( Copied article .. )))
Why do people volunteer?

In the past, it was thought that individuals volunteered strictly for altruistic reasons. The good Samaritan that goes out of their way to aid a stranger. The solider who goes back to save a fallen comrade. It was the noble thing for someone to lend a hand for the greater good of mankind. People helping those in need for no reward, favor or any grand show of gratitude. However, recent studies have indicated that there may be other reasons.

Some people volunteer to gain career experience, to build their resume. Develop skills or learn new ones. In addition volunteer work enables others to make contacts with people in their chosen career.

Some people volunteer to build self-esteem, to make themselves feel better. To feel needed, to feel that they have a place in this world. To truly feel like they are making a contribution to society.

Some people volunteer for the social aspect, to climb the social ladder while helping those less fortunate.

Some people volunteer as a result of the instilled set of values they have a set of values that compel them to act on deeply held beliefs about the importance of helping others.

Some people volunteer because they have felt the cruel sting that life may have afflicted them or a loved one with. For example someone might volunteer for the American Cancer Society because a family member died of cancer.

And some people do it because they want a better understanding about different people or the organization they serve, “bridging the gap,” so to speak, in order to better understand their community and themselves.

However, I volunteer to give back to my community. I am grateful for the help I received from others. When I was in high school I participated in the Upward Bound program.

There I was influenced by the academic success of my tutors. I was challenged by them to exceed all of their expectations, and to broaden my horizons of thinking. Through Upward Bound I was able to acquire skills and opportunities that have helped me become the man that I am today. So I give back to enable kids to have the same chances at life that I have had.

Volunteering is the ultimate payback to those who helped me on the road to success. I remember asking a counselor when I was in Upward Bound how I could repay him. He smiled and said “Shawn, you can help me by helping another.” A statement so simple, yet so deep in its meaning.

The feeling that I can shape someone’s life for the better is unexplainable. When I got my first volunteer position as a junior counselor at my local Boys and Girls club, I was eager to be a great role model for the kids.

But things did not work out as I initially thought. After about a couple of weeks of volunteering, I felt that my efforts were in vain, that no one really appreciated what I was trying to do. It was a slow process and it got to be frustrating.

By the time I had reached my wits end and was ready to quit, it happened that the very day I intended to tell my supervisor of my decision. I overheard some of the kids asking where I was that day. They said they liked having me around.

My desire to give back to the community was renewed by the fact that I made a difference.

I feel that you should not volunteer for the praise or to boost your resume. You should not do it because it gives your organization a community service for some kind of quota. You should do it simply because it must be done.

Yes, because if there was not a need to volunteer then why would we do it in the first place. When we volunteer we are ultimately filling in the gaps that have been stretched out by apathy and the need of the people.

Some people are dissatisfied with those people that choose to volunteer for personal gain. I on the other hand am not. Yes, it is selfish of them to be under the guise of doing something for others when they really are doing it for themselves. But despite the fact that they are benefiting from volunteering, so are the people they are helping. It is the classic case of symbiosis and that is a good thing. After all we all win when we volunteer.

So I implore everyone to find a cause and volunteer. Because not only will you be helping others, you will be helping yourself as well.

Why I Need To Be A Preschool Teacher

I need to be a preschool/kindergarten teacher .. I need to react with kids more than adults.. I love to see that sparkle in kids eyes when they learn something new .. I want to have a class outside and just teach them about nature and let them explore their senses and play.. I will let them hear Michael Jackson’s songs like (Heal the world) (We Are The World) (Lost Children) (The Earth Song) (Will You Be There) and all these songs which refresh your humility .. kids have humility by nature but gradually the world will take it from them so they have to learn how to refresh themselves.. I will learn them peace and love, rights and duties . how to be effectively better .. how to help others .. I will let them hear Charlie Chaplin ‘s speech (The Great Dictator) .. how to volunteer, I have to keep them curiousness up all the time, curious to nature, curious to knowledge, we are responsible of those kids, I want to help the world to be a better place for you and for me and for the entire human race, Michael Jackson said “if you wanna make a world a better place take a look at yourself then make the change” -Man In The Mirror Song-

My around the world adventure plan

Hometown:Cairo,Egypt

Places To Visit In Egypt
*Dahab, South Sinaa, Ismaielia, Port-Saieed, Fayoum, Luxur, Aswan*
Asturallia -Perth
China -Hong Kong
Palastien -Gaza
Maicronesa Island -PacificOcean
Samo Island -Nuzelanda
Malaysia -KualaLampur
Singapore
Maldives
Turkey -Istanbu
Kerala, India
Syria -Damascus
Iraq -Baghdad
UAE -Dubai
Egypt -Cairo **Rest**
SouthAfrica -Johannesburg
Japan -Tokyo
Pyongyang -Korea
Italy -Roma, Naples
France -Paris
Spain -Barçelona
Switzerland -Bern
Austria -Vienna
Germany -Berlin
UK -London
Canada -Yellowknife
USA -Newyork, Miami, California, Washington, Virginia
The Bahamas -Nassau
Santorini

Travelling Tips

-Google the country that you’re going to visit and let yourself explore some new unknown places.

-Carry a small phone with all the important contacts saved on it in case you lost your main phone or have stolen from you. 

-Use booking.com orhostelworld.com to search for cheap and good hostel/motel to stay in, and please book the location of the hostel because if you got a place with cheap price in an awkward place you will spend more money / time to getting in and out the country and that will be a nightmare but if your just added a little more money you will save time effort and even more money!

-Make a photocopy of passport, important papers and list of important numbers and separate it in your backpack. 

-Make an emergency money and hide it in your backpack

-Take a picture of your important identities on your cell phone. 

-Make a no.lock for your backpack and your carry on bag and lock the zippers with it.

-You’re not allowed to carry any self defense items in your carry on bag on the plane so you just keep it in your main suitcase/backpack and when you reach the country you wanted to travel just put you self defense items in your carryon bag so you can use it while touring the country. 
-I make w list of a things I need to take care of it before I travel/ I need to do and finish before I make the way to the airport. 

-Don’t you ever get a taxi without a meter he may cheat on you because you’re a tourist and you may don’t know the price of taxis in this country.

-Try to make hostel friends so you can eat together, discover the country together and just have fun, but make sure to be 100% self satisfied if you didn’t find anyone just enjoy yourself !

-Use airlines websites / applications like for example sky scanner to search for cheap and good trips/tickets

-Check airlines policy to avoid some troubles while traveling like being stopped for over luggage and things like that

-Don’t forget google map application and uber or grab application to use if you get lost or need a quick ride.

-Write in a note some main phrases and the most important words that you’re going to use, write it by the language of the country that you’re going to visit, bec. people like to hear tourists trying to speak them language and that grab them attention more to you.

-Ask for a discount for students at hostels and airline company

-Travel transit because it’s cheaper and it makes you discover new countries (the transit countries) for free for 6-12 hours

-Make a plan (starting-ending) point to your adventure.

-Eat street food, eat where the locals eat, ask local people about them country/lifestyle that make you know more about country’s culture.

–I have a list of a things I want to see, do, eat and experience by on the trip because i feel comfortable being organized but i aslo let myself explore unplanned places/things because there’s a special passion towards spontaneous actions too

-Buy a comfort backpack, front opening and waterproof

-I like to wear while traveling some comfortable clothes (Safari pants- Cotton undershirt-Sweatshrit-Sneakers)

-Download google translate app on your phone.

-Download offline maps so you can download the map of the country when you have wifi and use it while you’re hanging around when you don’t have the country’s SIM Card. 

-Download couch surfing app. 

-I don’t really like to spend money on material things as much, because really at the end of the day I would much rather staring out of an airplane window instead of a store front looking at mannequin or things to buy. 

-Keep some coins from each country you visit so you will end up owning a great collection of coins from around the world and that’s so awesome. 

-Pack less and explore more. 

-Even if you don’t do everything how you should don’t be sad, travel how you want to travel, if you want to stay in amazing places with different way really clean, quite expensive so do it if that will makes you happier, just because I decided to travel that way doesn’t mean you have to travel that way either, don’t be afraid of “Travel Wrong”
you can’t travel wrong, anyways you will be happy, and will discover new places with new taste of happiness Insha’allah and that’s why we travel, to discover places and ourselves and where we belong. Traveling is also about discovery. You’ll learn about new places to go from the people you run into. Even some of the most mundane places might end up being incredibly special because something unique happens or you run into some interesting people. You’ll discover new hobbies and interests as well! You definitely won’t be doing nothing. Keep your plans open and good luck.